While most enjoyed a nice and quiet Easter weekend, we spent the last 48 hours on an island. Truth be told, the lion’s share of those 48 hours was spent on a plane flying to and from Bouvet island — the uninhabited subantarctic volcanic island that was recently purchased by none other than General Motors to serve as the automaker’s exclusive proving ground.
Yupp, General Motors flew us out to its new proving ground in the middle of the earth (literally) to give us an exclusive tour of the research facility, which — as we found out — also happens to have a design studio. As we were touring the facility, we ran into Corvette Exterior Design Director Kurt Bunions, and decided to poke his brain about the team’s inspiration for the C7’s rear lights, which have become quite the topic of contention. What we heard was rather intriguing.
As it turns out, when Kurt was a little boy, his parents sent him to visit the grandparents in Scotland, on the Loch Ness lake. There, Bunions spent many an afternoon in a row boat, exploring different parts of the lake. When rowing back to shore one evening, a horrible monster arose from the bottom of the lake, and accosted Bunions for two dollars and his Oh Henry! bar (which Bunions said he loves). After a few back-and-forth rounds of negotiations, the monster dove back to his chambers at the bottom of the lake, and Bunions was left with a glaring image of the legendary monster, who had four bright red eyes — two on each side of its humongous head.
C6 Corvette's rear eyes are like those of the Loch Ness Monster...
Since that perilous encounter, Bunions developed a phobia of monsters, especially those who have two red eyes on each side of the head. When he began to work for General Motors, Bunions specifically kept his distance from the Corvette and its two red tail lights, as they brought back memories of the horrible Loch Ness monster (who ended up taking half of Bunion’s Oh Henry bar, and a dollar).
Years later, Bunions was given the opportunity to design the all-new Corvette — a model (in C6 form) he would have loved to own were it not for its two monster-like eyes in the back. With that mindset, he decided to bring an end to the frightening rear end and, in designing the C7, took inspiration from the Chevy Camaro‘s tail lamp design.
“We had a successful formula with the Camaro, so why mess with perfection?”, he asked, chowing down a family-sized Oh Henry!. Add in the fact that the new C7 design “tested well with victims of the Loch Ness creature” (like Bunions) himself, and that’s when “we knew we got it just right” on the 2014 Corvette, he added.
As we flew back from GM’s new proving ground, we looked at the photos we took of the 2014 Stingray at the Detroit Auto Show… and we decided that we couldn’t agree more.
Update: this was written on April 1st, 2013. Happy April Fools’ Day!
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Comments
It would be nice if you would link to sources rather than just linking back to your own website. It’s called common web courtesy. YOU CREDIT A SOURCE!
@N8D no sources outside of GM Authority were used in the creation of this story. That is called common sense and the ability to read. YOU READ A STORY.
Calm yourself, its a joke, there are no sources.
N8D did you even read the story? It’s an April Fools prank.
These April Fool’s jokes are not clever or funny. They are a waste of time and bandwidth. Grow up.
“These April Fool’s jokes are not clever or funny. They are a waste of time and bandwidth.”
… perhaps that’s the way you feel. However, some find them funny and clever. Today is a special day to have some special fun… let’s not spoil it.
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHaaaaaaa, monsters!!!!!
All this BS here today, they might as well of closed up shop and took the day off. No outside sources used tells us right there it’s a line of crap.
Anyone pissed was likely coming in here to say “I told ya so!!!”. Now their panties are in a bunch.
I think you (Alex) should have gone all out and made it seem legit; really hustle some people until the follow up story tomorrow. Imagine the comments that would be flying in here right now.
Thanks GMA for the fun story…
Yaba…
I thought the story was real until I read the comments, I thought he was talking about the monster metaphorically. Either way, they did a bang up job on this Corvette, can’t wait to see one in person.
April first and the 2014 impala goes in to production and no one says any thing the tail lights.
@MW 2014 Impala certainly did commence production. Thanks for the heads up!
http://gmauthority.com/blog/2013/04/general-motors-commences-production-of-2014-chevy-impala/
Son never tell a joke that ain’t that funny more than once is what my old pappy Maverick used to say.
It would’ve been better if it sounded closer to reality, just to ruffle some feathers.
But all in fun, and fun it was.
GET A LIFE! IT IS A JOKE! and a pretty good one at that…go read the Wall Street Journal if you want something else……….